Some Dads Don’t

Some dads make sure their employer knows well in advance that they want to be off work the weekend of the third Sunday of June.

If they can’t get it off, they’ll plan on calling in sick.

They pack in the charcoal, the hot dogs, and all of the kiddos into their four door SUVs.  They grab the fishing poles and fruit snacks.

They smear sunscreen on their nose and ketchup on their shirt.

Some dads play football with their boys out in the backyard.

They catch the sounds of their favorite music on the radio and the sounds of their sons laughing, as they carry the youngest child through the end zone.

Some dads fill sand in tiny sand buckets, some dads run to get kites started, some dads demonstrate how to dive, some dads teach how to use a saw or how to drive a car or how to mow the lawn.

Some dads laugh and romp and play.

Some dads get adoring gazes from their wife and silly gifts from their children.

They feel important and that their feelings of fatherhood are honored.

Some dads have all of their children with them.

But some dads don’t.
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqCmuQD7hDg]

International Bereaved Fathers Day – the fourth Sunday of September – for those dads who find something missing on Father’s day.

September 23, 2012

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BIRTH & BEREAVEMENT QUOTES
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She was a genius of sadness, immersing herself in it, separating its numerous strands, appreciating its subtle nuances. She was a prism through which sadness could be divided into its infinite spectrum.

— Jonathan Safran Foer, Everything Is Illuminated

No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.

— C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

I am strong.

— January, founder of Birth Without Fear

When someone you love dies, and you’re not expecting it, you don’t lose her all at once; you lose her in pieces over a long time—the way the mail stops coming, and her scent fades from the pillows and even from the clothes in her closet and drawers. Gradually, you accumulate the parts of her that are gone. Just when the day comes—when there’s a particular missing part that overwhelms you with the feeling that she’s gone, forever—there comes another day, and another specifically missing part.

— John Irving, A Prayer for Owen Meany

They say time heals all wounds, but that presumes the source of the grief is finite.

— Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Prince
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