The Most Beautiful Little Thing

Told by: Dannii

On the thirteenth of September, 2011, my partner and I found out that our little girl had passed away. Within a split second it just felt like our whole world had come crashing down. One minute we where leading normal lives, the next we were getting told that our baby had died.

That day was so unbearable. I must have screamed for what felt like hours but was probably just a few minutes. I couldntt believe this was happening to me. I kept thinking “why me, why my baby,why did she have to be taken away from us?” Then I got told I would have to give birth to her. The thought of that horrified me but I knew I had to go through with it. So they induced me and within an hour I had my baby. My partner actually covered my ears because he knew she wasn’t going to cry and that’s the sound I was so desperate to hear, but I knew it wasn’t going to happen. When I saw her for the first time I fell in love with her. She was the most beautiful little thing I had ever seen in my life, and I thought to myself “Life is so unfair.” She didn’t even have a chance to grow; we didn’t even get to say hello to her and here we were having to say goodbye, which was so very hard to do. It’s actually coming up to her first anniversery and thats why I am choosing to share my story now thank you for taking the time to read this.

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BIRTH & BEREAVEMENT QUOTES

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She was a genius of sadness, immersing herself in it, separating its numerous strands, appreciating its subtle nuances. She was a prism through which sadness could be divided into its infinite spectrum.

— Jonathan Safran Foer, Everything Is Illuminated

No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.

— C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

I am strong.

— January, founder of Birth Without Fear

When someone you love dies, and you’re not expecting it, you don’t lose her all at once; you lose her in pieces over a long time—the way the mail stops coming, and her scent fades from the pillows and even from the clothes in her closet and drawers. Gradually, you accumulate the parts of her that are gone. Just when the day comes—when there’s a particular missing part that overwhelms you with the feeling that she’s gone, forever—there comes another day, and another specifically missing part.

— John Irving, A Prayer for Owen Meany

They say time heals all wounds, but that presumes the source of the grief is finite.

— Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Prince

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