Tandem Nursing Grief

Tandem: Nursing & Grieving

When a mother is in a season of breastfeeding her newborn while also nursing her toddler, it is commonly called tandem nursing.

Here at stillbirthday, we honor a different scenario of tandem nursing:

If you have faced post-loss lactation and have shared that milk:

with a surviving multiple
with a surviving older sibling
with another baby, either through pumping or direct wetnursing

Or if you are a mother nursing your subsequent baby, and this has brought you into a new facet of your grief, as you mourn that nursing relationship not had with your beloved, deceased baby.

The Universal Breastfeeding Symbol is a simple blue and white logo. Here it’s been altered just slightly to honor the stillbirthday mothers who have had these experiences. You can use and share this photo from our Facebook page.

We have more information and support for mothers facing post-loss lactation, including support for expediting the drying process, donating your milk, or, using your milk in other ways that may bring a bit of healing to you during such a devastating and difficult time.

For mothers facing this “tandem nursing grief” – nursing a baby, while also nursing grief, we have a Rainbow Milk Campaign – an opportunity for you to share photos and stories of this sort of tandem nursing, and see the stories and photos shared by other stillbirthday mothers.

Related: Love Letters

Sarah-Anne is the first baby photographed in our Rainbow Milk campaign. Her mama was pregnant with triplets and lost all 3 babies. All girls, they collectively refer to them as ‘Hope’. This photo was taken during Sarah-Anne’s first birthday party; it was rainbow-themed.

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BIRTH & BEREAVEMENT QUOTES

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Miscarriages are labor, miscarriages are birth. To consider them less dishonors the woman whose womb has held life, however briefly.

— Kathryn Miller Ridiman

Death borders upon our birth, and our cradle stands in the grave.

— Joseph Hall

Even at our birth, death does but stand aside a little. And every day he looks towards us and muses somewhat to himself whether that day or the next he will draw nigh.

— Robert Bolt

Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.

— H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

The road to the sacred leads through the secular.

— Abraham Joshua Heschel

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BECOME A DOULA!

Enroll now in the Birth & Bereavement Doula® program!

We onboard enrolled students into the program by email invitation.

After tuition, you can email heidi.faith@stillbirthday.com directly to expedite this step. Alternatively, if you prefer fb communications, you can join us in Admissions.