Never Lose Hope

Told by: Stephanie

I am a mom of 5 beautiful and healthy kids but it wasn’t so easy at first and I had a lot of sorrow along the way.

I was young  17 and I met a boy that I fell head over heals with ahhh young love .. we went to far and I became pregnant, I had always been pro-life. So I decided to keep the baby.  He asked me to marry him I said yes. It was a rough 3 months with lots of morning sickness and cramps. I went in for my 3 month exam as l looked down at my growing tummy they put the Doppler on my tummy to find the heart beat.

Nothing. They looked again and heard a faint swishing. The nurse said oh he or she must be hiding and smiled and said lets schedule a ultra sound for next month. I went home that night feeling strange and worried. But the next week I thought I felt the baby move. That night at 1130pm I started spotting and cramping HORRIBLY. My boyfriend took me to the hospital and they listened for a heartbeat again and couldn’t find one then rushed me to ultra sound.

I remember the cold table as I laid there in a gown, I watched the ultra sound techs face as she moved the tool over my belly.  I asked her is everything ok.  She didn’t respond.  Then a long 2 mins went by she then said ok I am done. I then asked again “Is everything ok?”

She said a doctor will be in to see you shortly. I began to cry. I knew something was wrong. The longest 10 mins of my life the doctor came in and said you are having a missed Miscarriage. He then said they couldn’t see any baby in me so it most likely died months ago. He recommend a D&C or to send me home with medication to pass the placenta ect out at home.

I chose the D&C. Not one month later my boyfriend left me.

Less then 2 years later I met a wonderful man who was going into the Navy he proposed to me and we got married.  We kept trying to have a baby but nothing. I became very sad and then found out I was pregnant while he was out to sea. I told him we were both excited.

It was a very rough pregnancy I found out I had high blood pressure I  had to go on bed rest at 26 weeks it felt like eternity and at 35 weeks I went in to see my doctor and he said he had to induce me.

My blood pressure was to high. So I went in at 36 weeks to have my son. I was maxed out on picotin and one whole day went by… They then came in and broke my water.  26 hours later I was only dilated to 6cm and My son spiked a fever inside of me and so did I his heart began to decel and they rushed me in for a emergency c-section. 

Come to find out I had streptococcus B and because my son sat in my uterus with out fluid he became very sick. ( I didn’t get the swab at 36 weeks because that’s when they had be go in to be induced ) He was in the NICU for 22 days.

He pulled through and is a healthy 18 year old man now.

 

But less than 4 months after he was born I began spotting and fainting and having HORRIBLE pain in my right side so bad I could barely stand I would throw up, This didn’t happen all the time but at least once a week.  I was spotting brown smelly stringy blood but was told this was normal after having a c-section months ago… One night I took a bath and I couldn’t get out the pain was soooo bad.

My mom rushed me to the hospital they did a urine test and said I wasn’t pregnant. But then the doctor said draw blood. Which they did and saw I had high levels of HCG.

He had a ultra sound machine in and put it on my right side and there the baby was in my tube. Be began to freak out yelling we have a Ectopic Pregnancy here.. gestation  6  weeks. He asked me if I wanted to see the baby on the ultra sound screen.. I said no. I began to cry I was in so much shock. He then said we have to take you in to surgery NOW. Your baby is  in your fallopian tube and its about to rupture.

The next morning I woke up and the doctor came in and said he had to remove my whole right tube and I could still have children it would just be harder he also said thank God I came in he said with in 24 hours I could have died. 

I have had a lot of pain and loss and miscarried 3 other times. I think to myself I would have had 10 children.  I know I still do and one day I will be able to see my other 5.

I am thankful I am still here today and I am one tough mama.  My children are now 18,16,14,12 and 9.
Never lose hope.
[slideshow gallery_id=”1″]
Rate this post
0 0 votes
Article Rating
BIRTH & BEREAVEMENT QUOTES
«    1 of 16    »

I would not undo his existence just to undo my pain.

Our dead are never dead to us, until we have forgotten them.

— George Eliot

Much more than pro-life or pro-choice, I am pro-healing.

— an SBD Doula

I had seen birth and death but had thought they were different.

— T.S. Eliot

Since the day of my birth, my death began its walk. It is walking toward me, without hurrying.

— Jean Cocteau
«    1 of 16    »


See Our Babies Birth Support Find an SBD Doula Include Your Beloved Babies' Names
BECOME A DOULA!

Enroll now in the Birth & Bereavement Doula® program!


We onboard enrolled students into the program by email invitation.

After tuition, you can email heidi.faith@stillbirthday.com directly to expedite this step.  Alternatively, if you prefer fb communications, you can join us in Admissions.

HOW OUR HEARTS RELEASE BEGAN
TRENDING
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x