Debris Day

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Be a part of Earth Day, in a stillbirthday way!

On April 19, 2011, I gave birth to my miscarried baby.  Complete with tiny, perfectly formed toes, my baby was so very tiny, but, he was beautiful.  He was my son, is my son, my deceased baby.

A doctor, however, called my baby “debris”.  After the ultrasound monitor went dark, a doctor came in, placed her hands firmly on my shoulders and said,

“…we need to get that debris out of there.” 

(You can read more about why we take our shoes off here at stillbirthday)

August 1, 2011 stillbirthday opened our virtual “doors” to the world, pouring love into the broken hearts of families globally.  We’ve done a lot to minister to one another in our bereaved community, but Debris Day, is an opportunity to impact the world in a general way.

I am not going to hold a banner in protest or chant my anger to thwart mothers from receiving care from that particular institution.  I don’t believe that my message will be as effective that way.

Instead, I am going back to that facility, and I’m going to bring a big, black trash bag with me.  I’m going to look for litter, for trash, for old, chewed gum crusted to the sidewalk, for random pieces of junk that move with the wind.  I’m going to bend over, and I’m going to pick them up.

I’m going to clean up their debris.

This is an act of love, not vengeance.  There will be no dramatic protest or shouting or waving of my fist.  I am simply going to serve.  And I hope that whomever sees me scooping up forgotten, ugly clutter around their facility will know, that a baby is not debris.

Will you join me?

Anytime during the weekend of Earth day, wherever you are, take part in Debris Day.

Please, however you represent your babies, do it in a loving, respectful way, and please, take photos and share them with us!  You can email them to

Ideas can include:

  • picking up trash
  • helping to build a project in your community
  • donating non-perishable food items to a local church or pantry, including: can openers, toilet paper and paper towels
  • donating tissue boxes to local elementary schools – the significance of tissue can be healing for you
  • beginning a fundraiser or other program
  • our Farewell Celebrations section has additional idea suggestions

I understand that medical support is bound by terminology, although the words used in my experience were particularly cruel.  Through our Birth & Bereavement Doula Training, we’ve been able to supplement the care mothers receive, globally, to cross those lines where medical obligation end, to meet the mother where she is, in whatever interpretation she has of her own unique experience, to give her dignity, validation, and love – to help her find healing.



Let’s clean up the world, with a simple and loving message:

My Baby is Not Debris




Domestic Violence increases in pregnancy, leading to infant & maternal death.     [Path to Safety]      [Learn More]      [Quickly Exit to a Weather Channel]